Wednesday, January 11, 2006

Fucking Me-Me-Memes...

At the request of Impulsive Compulsive (an anonymous request… can we get some names going around here?), I am actually going to answer a goddamn meme. I respect her writing, and her fierceness (good word to describe her and her wiley ways). For anyone who does not know what a meme is, I’m not going to wikipedia-link it for you. It’s a chain-letterish variety of navel-gazing that only works on message boards, “about me” sections of webbish display, and here… in bloody blogland.

Five Weird Things About Me.

[here goes the navel-gazing part]

1. I use water on my cereal. That’s right. H-TWO to the fucking O. I prefer it that way. Milk spoils, which makes me feel like a wasteful asshole when it happens (which occurs EVERY time I buy the stuff). Milk also gives me horrendous gas, which however hilarious that might be to me, the others in my elevator have little appreciation for it.

2. I firmly believe that I am the stupidest person I’ve ever met. Actually, I have no idea whether or not this is weird in itself, but when coupled against my overwhelming optimism as far as my abilities go, and my relatively strong sense of confidence, well, it just ends up sounding weird. “Hi, I’m a complete and utter idiot. Now listen close to this complex and endearing story I’m about to tell…” Fucking pointlessly weird. But that’s me. Can’t run from myself.

3. I hate to touch door handles. This is a self-preservation method, actually. People are dirty. Their hands are even dirtier. My hands are dirty enough, and I’d prefer not to mingle mine with others.

4. I do not believe that anyone should be judged by the company they keep. I describe this as “weird” only because other people find it weird. There is something redeeming about every person you’ll ever come across. Perhaps it takes a weird person to see that in others. Again, I don’t see this as weird per se, but it apparently isn’t that common, and due to that, I suppose it is “weird” by definition.

5. Desserts are of little interest to me. I cannot be bribed or tempted by way of refined-sugar products. Not that I hate the stuff, I just don’t care about it. Chocolate in bar-form is alright, I suppose, but I wouldn’t pay money for it. Ice cream holds no power over me. Cake is actually fairly repulsive. But if you gimme fried pickles or quality liquor, and I’ll be yours forever.

[here's the chain letter part]

I want to see the following suffer through what I suffered through:

CanaDebbie

MMMMM... Bella!

LyCAN, or LyCAN'T?

Glitz n' Giggles

And because she's already ahead of the curve, I'll just link to Pretty Creative Alibi's list.

Please don't actually do the meme for my sake. Do it for the kids. Think of the kids, damnit!

7 comments:

Debbie said...

You did it!

Debbie said...

BASTARD!

Derek said...

jesus you are on crack. shit is good.

Impulsivecompulsive said...

Thanks for the intro. I can work with fierce.

I gotta try the water thing. Ever since The Kid quit milk, I haven't been able to have cereal thanks to light speed spoilage (damn that shit gets rank fast.)
I'll give it the old college try, anyway. Hey, I'm in college...freaky coincidence there. Yeah.

Debbie said...

OK, I did it, happy now?

Glitzy said...

...I likes me the Glitz n' Giggles moniker...

You don't care for dessert? You are a freakin' weirdo!

Hmm..drinking a beer right now so I'll have to think a bit on how on 5 flavors of weird.

Glitzy said...

posted!